he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
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