we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
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