Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
Randomize
