so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Tomorrow's Mother's Day and the only thing I can afford is beer and the McDonalds dollar menu. Do you think a Budweiser and a Big Mac says thank you for me fucking up your life since 1990?
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
Randomize
