Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
