...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize
