When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Randomize
