his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
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