but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
Randomize
