another moral hangover. fuck.
I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
Randomize
