you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
How drunk are you?
Completed.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
