and the officer said have you been drinking
and i said NOO SIR.
and he said, I am a woman.
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
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