So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
I feel like I could be a daytime drinking legend, like they could put that shit on my tombstone and right now your preventing me from reaching my full potential
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
Randomize
