just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
Thanks so much for having me, I'm really sorry that I almost caused your dog to catch on fire and also for breaking your doorknob
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
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