literally had 100 drinks last night.
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Randomize
