whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
Why did I call the Oregon Department of Transportation at 4:30 in the morning, and who did I talk to for three minutes?
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
Randomize
