sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
My bed smells like the plague
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
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