a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
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