The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
Randomize
