Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Randomize
