we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
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