I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
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