I just tipped a bartender in xanax.
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
Randomize
