I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
Hahahah pickled
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
Randomize
