CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
Randomize
