I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
Randomize
