I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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