if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
Randomize
