haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
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