The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize
