There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
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