So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
