I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
Randomize
