What a fucking waste of an outfit
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
