You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Randomize
