While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
Randomize
