just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Randomize