I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
Randomize
