I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
Randomize
