Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
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