Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
I forget how to act sober
Randomize
