you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
Sober January is a disaster.
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
Randomize
