on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
I just accidently deleted 60 gigs of porn from my external hard drive. Thats over 300 pornos! I think im gonna cry.
Im surprised that you are even able to text me right now.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
Randomize
