U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
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