Quick, to the slutcave!
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
Randomize
