i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Randomize
