I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
Randomize