I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
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