Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
I don’t know whether to call out sick or call in drunk
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize
