soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
Randomize
